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Kissing in Dubai  

Saturday 04 February 2012 (UAE)   
 
   
      
 

Kissing and other public displays of affection in Abu Dhabi, Dubai, UAE

None of what is written here should be taken as any sort of advice. It is only intended to be an observation of what happens in the UAE based on our experiences of living in the country. The only recommendation we can really give is that you follow the law, and be especially respectful of UAE culture during Ramadan, and/or outside Dubai, and even more so in Sharjah.

Dubai and the UAE do not have religious police with the job of checking on public morality, as is the case in Saudi Arabia. Nor do the police spend their time walking around shopping malls and bars looking for illegal hand-holding or kissing (at any rock concert in Dubai you can see the police calmly observe beer-drinking, hand-holding and kissing expats without taking any action). However, the job of the police is to uphold the law, and if someone makes a complaint, then the police will usually feel obliged to act, especially if the complainer is someone who might have more wasta than the police and/or the alleged offenders.

What is illegal in Dubai and the UAE (as far as we know)
  • Public Displays of Affection (PDA) but where the line is drawn between what is acceptable and what isn't, is sometimes variable. Assume that technically, any physical contact between two unrelated bodies of opposite sexes is forbidden, and you should be safe. Men and women shaking hands when greeting each other is probably on the right side of the law, but as a man, don't offer to shake a woman's hand unless she extends hers first.
  • Indecent behaviour, which could include kissing someone on the cheek but usually isn't something to worry about for normal greeting kisses, otherwise the jails would be filled with all the French, Italian, Lebanese, Spanish, South American, etc nationals that live in and visit the UAE.
  • Being somewhere private with a member of the opposite sex that you are not married or related to (in a car, private home, hotel room).
  • Having sex with someone you are not married to.
  • Public nudity - a bit obvious this, but note that men (and women) jogging in public should wear a t-shirt. Shirtless on the beach is probably ok.
  • Indecent attire - this could mean an offensive slogan on a t-shirt, not covering shoulders or legs, or apparently as of April 2010, Asian men wearing lungis in Sharjah (one was arrested). Bikinis on the beach should be ok. Topless is not. Thongs (not the Australian kind) are not, although you might see them occasionally.
Kissing in Dubai
  • Dubai and the UAE have certain cultural and legal constraints on what might be regarded as acceptable behaviour in many other countries, usually western nations.
  • Public displays of affection (PDA) such as kissing between opposite genders, holding hands, and other romantic behaviour is at least frowned upon, and might get you in trouble with the police. Especially if you're in Sharjah, if it's during Ramadan, or if someone easily offended by such behaviour sees you and reports you to the police.
  • Same gender greeting kisses on the cheek are unlikely to cause offence, unless a passer by, and/or the police, think it's an indication the couple are homosexual.
  • Opposite gender greeting style kisses on the cheek are commonly seen, and usually tolerated by those who might take offence. But don't be too brazen about it.
  • Couples kissing on the lips to say goodbye or hello in public, for example at the Dubai airport, are not usually going to get into trouble even though technically it's probably illegal. Or at least unacceptable culturally. Chances of causing offence resulting in problems with the law increase if the kiss becomes obviously more sexual in nature, or is lengthy. French kissing in public would definitely be ill-advised.
  • Technically it makes no difference if a couple is married, or in a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship. However, in reality, if an unmarried couple gets into bother over a kissing related incident, they are probably more likely to be penalised, or suffer a greater penalty.
  • Couples behaving affectionately in bars and nightclubs in Dubai, and/or at concerts and other events where alcohol is available, such as the Dubai Rugby 7s, are more likely to be tolerated than if displaying the same sort of behaviour in a shopping mall or more public venue.
  • However, groping each other in a sexual way anywhere in public (even in a bar) is much more likely to result in a visit to a police station.
  • If alcohol in Dubai is part of the activities, and the interest of the police has been aroused, then penalties are more likely to be imposed, and/or likely to be more severe.
  • A jail sentence and/or fine and/or deportation are the possible penalties if caught for any PDA related activity.
Holding hands in public
  • Men and women holding hands is a public display of affection which in theory could result in a problem but is unlikely to, unless in Sharjah, or it's Ramadan.
  • Walking through shopping centers, especially in Dubai, it is not uncommon to see even Emirati couples (of opposite sexes) holding hands.
  • Mothers and fathers holding their children's hands is acceptable.
  • It is quite common to see groups of Asian / Indian / Pakistani male nationals holding hands. A cultural habit that often leaves westerners feeling confused given that couples are apparently not allowed to do the same. It is not (usually) an indication of homosexuality. Unknown whether or not strictly speaking such hand-holding is legally permitted or not. If you are a westerner, don't be tempted to hold hands with your same-sex friend just to see what happens. It is more likely that the authorities will wonder if you are gay, which might result in a visit to the police station, or worse.
Conviction of sex related crimes in UAE
  • For the successful prosecution of the crime of having sex outside of marriage in the UAE, Mohammed Al Suwaidi, a lawyer at the Al Suwaidi legal firm, was reported as saying (Xpress 27 January 2011) that a high degree of evidence is required for sex charges to stick in court, including a suspect's confession, witness testimonies or medical tests. ... The burden of proof under Sharia (Islamic law) is even tougher. Under Sharia, four witnesses are required to testify and if there are less than four then the other witnesses may be charged with defamation.
  • In reality, what the court seems to think is acceptable appears to sometimes be different to what the accused might think is necessary to prove guilt, especially in emirates other than Dubai. For example a young lady was accused and convicted of illegal sexual intercourse in Khor Fakkan on the Fujairah coast in May 2009, despite tests reportedly proving otherwise (see further details below). And an odd twist to that story was that her alleged sex partner was acquitted of the crime.

Sex, indecent exposure and kissing related stories in the UAE

  • On 29 April 2011, Gulf News reported a case in Ras Al Khaimah where a housemaid was sentenced to 3 months in jail followed by deportation, and a 15 year old boy was sent to a juvenile deliquents center for observation, as a result of police arresting the maid after she gave birth at Saqr Hospital in RAK. The hospital reported her to the police when she failed to prove she was married. The maid reportedly claimed the boy raped her, and the sponsor's family kept her locked up for 9 months until she gave birth, while the boy claimed that the maid seduced him. The report said The Criminal Court in Ras Al Khaimah convicted the Ethiopian housemaid and 15-year-old Emirati schoolboy despite the woman's claims that she was raped by him. The verdict was appealed by the housemaid's lawyer.
  • On 27 April 2011, Gulf News reported a case at the Dubai Court of First Instance involving a claim of rape of a housemaid. The report said: According to prosecution records, the 37-year-old Emirati police corporal's Uzbek wife alleged that she spotted her husband undressing and sexually abusing their 25-year-old housemaid inside the pigeon cage in their villa's front yard. During prosecution questioning, the housemaid alleged that the suspect raped her nearly 14 times. She was also apparently threatened with death. The 7 Days newspaper quoted her as saying "He raped me 14 times. He threatened to kill me if I told the police. One time I was feeding the pigeons when he tried to take off my clothes and molested me." The accused denied the charges, and the case was adjourned until 07 June 2011.
  • On 02 September 2010, the Gulf News reported about a 17 year boy who was deported after having sex with a 15 year girl - The Dubai Juveniles Court recently found the 17-year-old Lebanese boy and 15-year-old Emirati girl guilty of having consensual sex. The court decided to reprimand the pair and hand them over to their parents. However sources close to the case told Gulf News that the boy had been deported back to his country.
  • In May 2010, the Dubai Appeals Court overturned the decision of the Dubai Misdemeanors Court to convict a Pakistani couple of public indecency after they were found having sex in a car. Their lawyer successfully argued that the inside of a car is a private place, not public, helped by the car having windows tinted dark enough that the policeman at the scene couldn't see inside. The couple were married. The original sentence was a month in jail followed by deportation. Unknown if the car windows were tinted darker than the legally allowed 30% limit, or if the car owner was in trouble if they were.
  • In March 2010, the RAK Criminal Court sentenced a Bangladeshi man and an Indian woman to one year in jail followed by deportation after police caught them having sex in a car. Police responded to a complaint by a passer-by. The sentence appeared to be for the couple having illicit sex since the court did not recognise the marriage certificate that was produced, saying it wasn't attested.
14 year old school girl arrested for adultery in Ajman - March 2011
  • A 14 year old school girl was reportedly arrested in Ajman on 22 March 2011 and jailed on a charge of adultery after she was caught on the rooftop of her house with her 25 year old boyfriend (Gulf News 04 April). Later reports said the girl would be tried in April 2011.
  • Her father said, according to the report, that "When police called me to report along with my daughter to the CID, ... I learnt that someone had complained against her - that she was meeting an adult man on the roof of our building. ... Police surprised me when they said she should go behind bars and I had to go back home without my daughter."
  • Apparently there is a case pending with the Public Prosecutor as a result of the father previously complaining about the boyfriend, reportedly saying "Once I complained against him to police when I learnt that he was chasing her to her school bus."
  • After spending a couple of weeks in Ajman Central Jail, apparently including 3 days in solitary confinement, she was transferred to a juvenile detention center in Sharjah.
  • The GN report said The 14-year-old school student was kept in police custody and later referred to a gynaecologist who confirmed she was still a virgin, her father told Gulf News.
  • A Gulf News report 13 April 2011 quoted an unnamed "law expert" as saying "The law states that the minimum age of suspects in crimes related to sex must be 15 years. Such cases should be conducted in special juvenile courts. Otherwise, suspects are considered victims rather than suspects,"
  • The boyfriend was reportedly arrested in Dubai but it's not clear what happened to him.
Kiwi Brazilian British love triangle in Dubai - December 2010
  • Just before Christmas 2010, one NZ male and two females from Brazil and UK discovered the hard way that Dubai Police are not amused when called to deal with domestic disturbances between unmarried people having sex.
  • Mr Kiwi Bloke (TC, age 32?) had a Brazilian girlfriend (PF, age 24 or 25) but dumped her. The day after the dumping, he had formed a good enough friendship with a young lady from Britain (DS, age 25 or 31) that the two of them reportedly slept together. That would probably have made for a pleasant memory except that ...
  • ... sometime during the morning-after-coitus, the just-barely-ex-girlfriend, PF, visited Mr TC at his apartment to discover that he was not as lonely as she was probably hoping he would be.
  • The Brazilian was not amused and threatened the other occupants with a knife, along with throwing abuse and household items around. The new girl locked herself in the bathroom, and the busy boy called the cops.
  • The cops couldn't figure out what was going on so they arrested everyone (odd since it sounded like it would have been quite obvious what had happened).
  • The two girls were chucked into the same jail cell and reportedly became friends. Unknown if either, neither, or both are still considered to be a girlfriend of TC, who was also thrown in jail for a while, but with men. Unknown if he made any more new friends while incarcerated.
  • Foreign newspapers picked up on the story with great delight. The Sun found a good friend of DS who was quoted in a 21 January 2011 report as saying "She left England in 2003 after working as a lapdancer in Hull and at Spearmint Rhino in Birmingham."
  • Nine News in Australia reported on 23 January 2011 that PF wasn't an ex-girlfriend, quoting her as saying "We hadn't split up, we's [sic] had an argument. We have been seeing each other for five years and were going to get married."
  • Xpress (Gulf News) reported 27 January 2011 that the trio faced a total of 5 charges (reduced from 12 initially) of consensual sex, threatening to kill, and consuming alcohol without a licence. It wasn't clear who faced which charge although apparently all three faced the sex charge.
  • All three appeared in court in Dubai on 16 February 2011 on charges of having sex outside marriage, and PF was also charged with something to do with her alleged violent behaviour. All three denied the sex charges. Their next appearance is scheduled for 27 February 2011.
  • Update: The kiwi received 2 months in jail for illegal sex, the Brit 1 month for illegal sex, the Brazilian 1 month for illegal sex and 1 month for threatening to kill the others. They also received fines - AED 1,000? Deportation at the end of the jail sentences was also imposed.
Brazilian schoolgirl allegedly raped by bus driver - April 2010
  • In July 2010 in the Abu Dhabi Court of First Instance, a 14 year old Brazilian girl was charged with having consensual sex, and a 28 year old Pakistani bus driver was charged with rape, as a result of an encounter between the two parties at the girls home in April 2010.
  • The girl claimed she was raped, but the man claimed he was seduced. Then before the first court hearing, the girl withdrew her claim and said nothing had happened.
  • The National reported 30 July 2010 that even if the man's story prevailed, he could still be charged with statutory rape given that the girl was below 18, the age of consent. But on 10 August 2010, the girl was sentenced to 6 months in jail followed by deportation, and the man was sentenced to 1 year in jail, followed by deportation. Both defendents were convicted of consensual sex under Sharia law in the Abu Dhabi Court of First Instance.
  • The presiding judge, Chief Justice Saeed Abdul Bashir was reported by the Gulf News as saying "She had been sending very intimate pictures of herself to the accused, some of which included nude pictures, … and also used to send him text messages," which is what apparently convinced him that the 14 year old girl was old enough and responsible enough to know what she was doing, and deserved to go to jail for not dealing with her changing hormonal levels during puberty in accordance with UAE law.
  • The headline of the 10 August 2010 report in The National said Girl, 14, jailed for sex with school bus driver. However, a 15 August 2010 WAM news report clarified that she wasn't jailed, saying that the girl has not been detained and has been in the custody of her family throughout the investigation and the court hearings and that she will remain with her family until the completion of the due legal process, including any appeal.
  • A further report in The National 19 August 2010 said that Public prosecutors and defence lawyers have joined together in court to argue that a 14-year-old girl jailed for having consensual sex with her school bus driver should not have been tried under Sharia ... Consensual sex should be prosecuted under UAE law. Also, under UAE law, a defendant must be over 18 to be tried as an adult. The lawyers argue that Abu Dhabi Criminal Court of First Instance has therefore made an error.
  • The girl appealed against her sentence in a second hearing at the Abu Dhabi Court of Appeals according to a 30 September 2010 Gulf News report (the report also made the bus driver younger by 3 years, saying he was 25 years old). At the first appeal hearing earlier in September 2010, the court ordered a lawyer to be assigned to the bus driver.
  • On 19 October 2010, the appeals court overturned the girl's conviction but upheld the driver's conviction (for consensual sex, not for rape). The National reported on 20 October 2010: However the Appeal Court found yesterday that she was too young to have been tried as an adult, and threw out the guilty verdict. ... He was found guilty and sentenced to a year in prison and deportation – a verdict that was upheld yesterday.
Dubai Kissing Couple at JBR - November 2009
  • In November 2009, a British couple were reportedly kissing in a restaurant at Jumeirah Beach Residence The Walk (Bob's Diner) in Dubai at around 2am. The couple were arrested, convicted, and sentenced to one month in jail along with a fine of AED 1000 and deportation. Some of the penalty was for consuming alcohol.
  • The eyewitness, a 2 year old child, saw them kissing on the lips according to her mother. The couple claimed they were just kissing each other on the cheeks.
  • The Gulf News reported on 12 March 2010 that the mother of the eyewitness made a statement to the court that said "My daughter told me that the accused were kissing on the mouth. Then I spotted them doing so myself. I also saw them touching each other, as they were seated two to three metres away from our table. A number of customers witnessed the scene as well,"
  • The same report also quoted the verdict from the report as saying "The court concluded that the man kissed and touched the woman's leg and shoulder in the restaurant in JBR. She consented to what he did. The court deemed their behaviour as public indecency and a breach of modesty and honour."
  • As the consumption of alcohol in Dubai is permitted under certain circumstances, it also seems surprising that the couple were convicted of consuming alcohol (which they pleaded guilty to). It's not exactly clear what law they actually broke with respect to the alcohol consumption.
  • The couple appealed the initial conviction handed out at the Court of First Instance, and lost at the Court of Appeal, after which the woman served her one month jail sentence and returned home to Britain.
  • The man appealed again at the Court of Cassation, and lost (verdict reported on 24 May 2010).
  • The BBC reported on 24 May 2010 that "The original complaint was made by a local Emirati woman. She never appeared in court and lawyers were never able to contact her." Which some might regard as a rather unnnerving reflection on the legal system (or lack of it) in Dubai.
  • Many wonder what else might have happened that wasn't reported, or if the complainant had a lot of wasta, or if the Dubai authorities are simply trying to teach all the kissing expats and tourists a lesson.
  • Unfortunately, the mismatch between the promotional and marketing materials coming out of Dubai (including from government owned entities), and what the Dubai court system apparently wants couples not to do, means that residents and visitors will remain confused about how to behave in Dubai.
Jail for sex but no sex in Sharjah - May 2009
  • A British-South African lady, Roxanne Hillier, and her Emirati boss (initials MH) were nabbed by Sharjah Police on 16 May 2009 after a tipoff or complaint that they were sleeping together.
  • Ms Hillier was a dive instructor in Khorfakkan (Khor Fakkan) on the east coast, north of Fujairah but politically part of the Sharjah Emirate. At the time of the arrest, she was reportedly sleeping in the dive centre while her boss was working in another part of the centre.
  • The Telegraph (UK) reported 09 June 2009 that Her father, Freddie Hillier, said police records showed the raid was ordered after someone rang them to make a complaint about her boss.
  • Following the arrest, the case went to court which resulted in a conviction for both parties of having sex and being alone in a commercial building after working hours.
  • The Telegraph reported that Mr Hillier said his daughter's big mistake was to sign a confession in Arabic that she did not understand. "They were shouting at her in Arabic," he said. "She was scared and made the mistake of bowing to pressure. She thought that was going to get her off." She told the prosecution the next day that she was retracting her confession, but the case went ahead anyway.
  • Sharjah is known as a much more conservative emirate than the rest of the UAE, which might explain why the court convicted the pair even though the defense argued there was no evidence the two had been having sex - providing medical test results to back up their claim. The prosecution reportedly did not provide any evidence that the two were having sex, except, presumably, Ms Hillier's confession.
  • Maktoob Business News reported on 26 July 2009 that Hillier said the police took her to be examined by doctors immediately. “They took me to this place where I was examined by a doctor and nurse, both women. They lifted up my clothes and stuck probes everywhere,” she said. ... The tests proved Hillier did not have sex with her boss, according to documents seen by Maktoob Business,
  • Ms Hillier was sentenced to 3 months in jail followed by deportation, and Mr H got a 6 month jail sentence. The case then went to the appeals court.
  • Maktoob Business News reported on 15 June 2009 that Both had hoped to be freed by the court of appeal on Sunday after tests into whether they had sex came back negative. The appeal judges reserved their decision, which they will deliver next week.
  • In June 2009, after an appeal, Mr H was released from prison after his sentence was reduced or acquitted, but Ms Hillier's punishment was upheld. Which doesn't really make sense - there wasn't a clear explanation from the Sharjah courts about how they thought Ms Hillier could be in the same room with Mr H and have sex with him, while he wasn't in the room with her or having sex with her. Perhaps they thought she was having sex with herself, but we didn't think that was a crime in Sharjah or the UAE.
  • Or maybe they took into account what the South African consulate in Dubai thought. Pretoria News reported 22 June 2009 that South African consular staff said Hillier could have escaped jail if she had admitted guilt. They said the evidence against her was overwhelming, apparently including medical tests that confirmed the pair had had sex and a confession from Hillier's boss.
  • And Maktoob Business repeated a version of that report on 29 September 2009: Following Roxanne's conviction Ishwar Mahadeo, consul at the South African Consulate General in Dubai, told South African daily the Mercury that the evidence against her was “overwhelming” and that it included "medical tests that confirmed the pair had had sex. The fact is that the sponsor had sexual intercourse with her that night,"
  • On 26 July 2009 Ms Hillier was released early after being pardoned by the Ruler of Sharjah, Dr Sheikh Sultan bin Mohammed Al Qassimi.
  • The National reported on 28 July 2010 that She was told she would not be deported but would be able to leave of her own accord. She left.
Sex on the beach couple in Dubai - July 2008
  • On 05 July 2008, a couple were reportedly having sex on a beach in Dubai after getting drunk at one of Dubai's infamous Friday brunches, an activity that would probably get people into trouble anywhere in the world.
  • There were mixed reports about what actually happened - some claiming the police first gave the couple a warning, which was ignored, other reports said the women threw or waved a shoe at the policeman, while the couple apparently said they were just kissing and hugging. Later reports in the UK press had the male half of the coupling indicating that something more than just kissing and hugging had gone on.
  • The couple were arrested, fined 1000 dirhams, received a 3 month jail sentence, and deportation. The jail sentence was not carried out but they were deported.
  • The BBC reported that "Palmer and Acors were found guilty of unmarried sex and public indecency at Dubai's Court of First Instance."

Sharjah rules

  • Sharjah is an emirate that is more conservative than the rest of the UAE and so visitors and residents should be more circumspect with any sort of affectionate behaviour in public.
  • Sharjah has stricter "Decency Laws" than other emirates (if they have any). For example men should not wear shorts in public, women should not expose their knees or shoulders in public. Despite the laws, it is still common to see men in shorts, and naked women's shoulders, in Sharjah shopping malls.
  • On 07 April 2010, the Gulf News reported "Sharjah bans South Asian attire lungi in public" after an Asian man was arrested in Sharjah for wearing a lungi (a kind of wraparound clothing item, like a sarong) in public. Gulf News asked a Sharjah Police officer about any clothing laws and reported "He said people were expected to wear decent clothes in public, but did not explain if there was a ban on wearing the lungi in public." Which reflects common confusion about many rules in Sharjah.
A last word

In our opinion, given the number of western expats that happily live in Dubai, or visit Dubai, for most couples (whether married or not), as long as they behave reasonably respectfully and sensibly, it is unlikely that they will find themselves in trouble just for holding hands while walking through a shopping mall, or kissing each other hello at the airport. Just keep the tongues and hands under control until in the privacy of home or hotel bedroom. And if anyone has something to say about your behaviour, whether police, security official, or member of public: stop whatever it is you were doing, apologise politely, and say how much you are enjoying the country. Whatever you do, don't start ranting about being right, or how things are different in your own country, or make any sort of criticism of UAE culture and morals.

Last update Sunday 21-Aug-2011. Page development 4L 5C.
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